I went to Albania and all I got was this lousy...

-a pounding migraine
-12 very itchy huge red mosquito bites
-a very widespread heat rash
-diarrhea
-my period
-seasickness
-two stolen bags

We went to Albania for the weekend and it was a disaster. One of the family's old babysitters is Albanian and her sister's daughter was getting christened and D and Ir were the godmothers. We left Saturday morning and came back Sunday evening but it seemed like so much longer. E's parents came with us; we all got to the port of Corfu and were looking for passport control for our specific boat. We found it and there were about 200 people in front of us, they were mostly a tour group and they were loud and smelly. The smell was actually incredible and merits it's own specific sentence, I thought I was going to pass out from it and Ir puked because of it. No I am not kidding.
We made it through passport control, the boat was supposed to leave at 9 but it didn't leave until 10. This boat is called a dolphin it's very fast very small and gross. In front of us sat two prisoners being exported back to Albania. All very exciting. Ir threw up again (the smell combined with the rocking). We got to Albania in a half hour. We then discovered that the grandparents had taken a bag that wasn't ours. They thought it belonged to us so they just brought it along. So we had to go to the the port authorities in Albania and fill out forms which took forever so they could send it back to whomever. The old babysitter, Z, met us along with her brother in law and so we piled into that car and a taxi, not airconditioned. The heat was so oppressive I wanted to cry; D and Ir actually did cry, well cry and scream and fight the whole hour and a half it took to get to our destination. OOO yes that's also when my period came... oh mother nature, you're so funny.
We made it to our destination Gjyrokastra (I know I spelled that wrong) we stayed in the nicest hotel the city had. The electricity was out when we got there so the air conditioner was broken. Not that it really mattered at this point. We were basically fried anyway. After we found our rooms and everything we then discovered that the grandparents had taken ANOTHER bag from Corfu that wasn't ours. Why they didn't say anything at the Albanian port when we were taking care of the other bag is beyond me. Then Ir started to cry again, I guess it's more like she just continued to cry, because she thought her grandma was going to go to jail for stealing two bags.
At this point my body was breaking out in little red spots everywhere. We went somewhere for lunch which turned into a big mistake because almost immediately all of us got diarrhea. So we returned to our boiling hotel rooms. The rest of the weekend passed in a hazy furnace like blur. We left on Sunday and the boat ride back was not on a dolphin but on the oldest boat allowed to sail the seas. It was terrible and it took 2 hours and I was sick the whole time, well the whole boat was sick. It was pretty disgusting.

So yeah, I can't really tell you anything about Albania except that if I ever go back I will be carrying an airconditioner with me